Missing Loved Ones at Christmas
As we look forward to the festive period ahead, it’s worth spending a little time reflecting on those who won’t be joining us in the festivities. This time of year brings to the fore memories of Christmases past, times when we looked forward to visiting friends, going to parties, giving and receiving presents and all the other nice things associated with this time of year.
However, there are sad memories that we also remember, which we’d often rather not, as they can spoil what’s going on around us. But memories don’t dance to our biding, so it’s the wisest course of action to face up to them, as this can help fade the sadness. There are many reasons our loved ones may be missing in our lives at any time of the year, but it just seems more poignant now.
One of the most common reasons is that they’ve passed on, but no matter how long ago this happened, nothing can erase the memories, both good and bad, so face up to them and turn them into pleasant ones. If possible, a visit to the churchyard to place flowers helps by being a positive thing in their memory. If that’s not possible, calling into a church to pray quietly can also bring a sense of peace and take the edge off the pain.
Of course, there are also other reasons for missing loved ones. With many one-parent families these days it’s not just the adults who can feel they’re missing out, the children may be feeling it more. If you are a single parent, try not to spoil the illusion that everything is fine and the child, or children, will have the benefit of two Christmases! If your loved one has to be working away over the festive period, then that to can cause heart-ache at having to be apart, especially at this time of year. Phone calls, face-time, sending personal videos and personal letters can all help bring a feeling of closeness and of course, can often be kept and replayed over and over again.
Whatever the reason you will be missing loved ones over the festive season, there are things you can try to help make it less painful. Try setting aside a certain day, or even a few hours, when you will allow yourself to self-indulge and wallow in memories, both happy and sad. Pick a quiet room, light a few candles for effect, have photos and mementos that remind you of them and indulge yourself in whatever feelings that come to the fore.
Crying is ok, so expect it, and keep a box of tissues at the ready. Have paper and pen to hand to write all your thoughts down, things you wish you’d said or done, or how you miss them. Then after a while, you should feel a sense of lightness as you’ve unburdened your thoughts. Now, set fire to the words you’ve written, and as you see them turn to smoke, say a prayer of love and forgiveness. Then you should celebrate, and treat yourself to something light to get you back in the festive mood. Maybe a drink or something nice to eat, or watching a favourite film, can help bring you back into the present, but you should promise yourself that the next day is the first day if your new life, now that you’ve wiped the slate clean, at least for a little while!
If you feel you do need a little help at this time of year, don’t forget that our psychics and mediums are here to give you guidance and insight.